Pastor Jackie

    A couple of months ago at a meeting and eating we talked about helping out a family at Christmas.  The places that we looked for a family had already served everyone they knew about.  So I gave up.
    Yesterday, a 14 year old boy received food from his school for his family; His six siblings and his grandmother who they all live with.  He was so grateful, then today he went back to one of the people and asked if there were going to be any presents for his little brothers and sisters.  If there weren’t, that was ok, he was just wondering.
    The administrator who called the grandmother to check out the question, was almost in tears because the grandmother felt so humiliated.  When asked what the kids needed or wanted, she said, if they could just get some underwear and socks, I would be so grateful.
    Knowing this faith community the way that I do, I believe they will have much more.

    I’ve Been reading a book by Parker Palmer called The Promise of Paradox.  I’m almost done with it, so you shouldn’t have to hear about it much more.  It is a great book though.  One of the ideas that he discusses is the idea of paradox verses dualities.  The way I understand it, is like this.  Paradox demands tension between two apparent opposites.  For example good and bad, black and white, right and wrong.  Dualities would be the two apparent opposities just mentioned above.  Sort of wierd, but consider this.
    Palmer says “There is truth in both poles, and we live most creatively when we live between them in tension.” (63)  Now, I find myself, more often than not, trying to balance the right and wrong opposites around the issue of the foodbank.  The rules are: people may come once a month.  If you come more than that, you are not supposed to get food.  Yesterday, a woman with 5 kids walked to the food pantry in the snow and temperatures in the teens, to get food for her family.  She had been there two weeks ago.  She shouldn’t get food.  She did get food.  
    A man came for food, asked if we had any shoes.  After making sure his kids had shoes, there was no money left for him to have new shoes.  He left with shoes.
    A woman came through the door, minutes before time to close.  We had been hit hard, energy was running a bit low.  She asked to talk to me.  Our food pantry had blessed her in the past, she wanted to share from her blessings this year.  She donated $200.00. 
    We must live into the paradox and stand in the tension, if we are to lean on the strength of God.

    The last week before Christmas.  The waiting is almost over.  I was thinking about waiting and expectation this morning as I was praying.  Not only in the midst of the advent Christmas season, but also in the context of the play.  I was thinking about hearing the cast talking on Saturday night after the play.  They were all exhausted, yet there was a sense of loss in all their voices.  It was over now.  The thing they had worked weeks and weeks to do, was over.  There would not be another curtain call, no more audiences, no more hurrying home after work to be at the church in time for rehearsal.  What a relief, and yet what a loss.
    Much the same for Christmas, I think.  We build up these hopes and expectations for THE BIG DAY.  For some it is more than one day, with Christmas at this parents on one day, Christmas at another parents on another day.  Sometimes, just scheduling where you are going to be at what time is as grueling as the day itself.  And yet, when it is all over, all the packages opened, all the food consumed and packed properly in the tupperware for the next days lunch, there is that same sense of loss.  
    I used to think it a sense of emptiness that I needed to fill.  As I have matured, I find it to be more a time of reflection on the day or the event.  A time of searching for the meaning in the event, and wonder at the extent of all that has happened.
    Each one of the actors in our play, should feel an enormous sense of pride in what they were able to do.  They were amazing.  Each one of them in their own way, yet as a cast, what an impact they made.  Much like the birth of The Christ.  One moment in time event, life lasting meaning.

    Last night was the first night of the show Radio TBS at the church.  What a scream!  I have watched these actors and actresses work day after day for over a month to make this show happen.  Although there were some days, I am sure they never thought they would get their lines right, THEY DID.  One of the most amazing things to witness is the bonding and community that has developed within this group of people.  The production of the show has become more important than who gets the credit, who forgets their lines, whose costume doesn’t work, and who stands in the light.  
    Exactly where John the Baptist was with Jesus.  Vision….vision to go the extra mile for the team.  Community that loves and cares about each other becomes more important than what I want or need.  That concept, no matter how foreign to us, is in fact the beloved community that Jesus envisioned,that Martin Luther spoke of, that Ghandi worked toward, and that will move us closer to the Justice that Micah spoke of.  May it be so.

    As I was looking for something that was misplaced this morning, I was struck by the thought that perhaps that is what we do with Christmas some times.  Perhaps, all we really do is misplace in our minds, why we even think about December 25th in any particular way.  Funny how when you know that something is supposed to be a certain way, you really come to expect it that way.  I was really thinking about the altar at church.  It woke me up in the middle of the night, these thoughts about our altar.  Where should it be, which way should it face, how should it be adorned? 
    Does it really matter?  Is there a book somewhere that says THE ALTAR SHOULD…..
I don’t know.  If there is, they didn’t show it to me in seminary.  For me, the more important question is, does God care?  Do you suppose that it makes any difference to God, perhaps it increases or decreases Gods love for us?
    When I ask those questions, it seems sort of silly, yet, for some it seems to be devastatingly important.  I wonder why…..
    

    In my current reading of Good to Great, the author talks about the difference between ruthless and rigorous.  He is really talking about getting the right people on the bus (leadership), and getting the wrong people off the bus.  I have to admit, I had never really thought about leadership in this way.
    I was talking with a friend the other day, and said that one of the hardest things to do is to pull a group along, wheter it is a team, a family, or the congregation.  My friend said that pulling conjured up a much better picture than pushing.  I’ve been thinking about that a lot.  And I have to say that I agree.
    If I am going to pull someone I have to go where I want them to go first. I have to be willing to enter that behavior, or place.  Heck, once you can see that someone else is there and its not so bad, it is much easier to want to go there.  If I push someone, they are the first to enter the new place, new behavior, new attitude.  That is really scary.
    Thank-you my friend, for opening a new door for me to my understanding.  Let us all be door openers for God.

       I’ve been reading a book called “Suicide Notes”, it is quite humerous and sad all at the same time.  More than anything, I think it gives you cause to think.  Reason to think about kids, parents, suicide, church, friends, what each of those mean and how they interact with one another.  I must say, some of the situations make me very sad, and cause me to wonder how we got so far away from our kids.
        I really worry about our kids and our time with them, and our inability to be present in their lives.  Why is it that we can’t be open and honest with them?  What is it that makes us unable to speak openly about sex and matters of the heart?  Why do we not want them to see us caring for and loving each other?  More than anything I wish that someone would have told me when I was growing up that love comes in lots of flavors and types, and that God’s love encompasses all of those.