Pastor Jackie

    I was listening to a commercial on the television as I was ironing tonight that said this station was going to have an exclusive interview with President Obama and ask him how he was going to fix our country.  As I thought about that, I realized what a trap they were setting for our new President.  The same sort of trap that we set for God nearly every day.  We want God to fix the problems that exist in our world.  
    Sometimes, I can only imagine what God thinks about our bargaining and tricks that we use to convince God that what we want is really the thing to do.  I get this picture in my mind of a Santa Clause type person sitting on a bank of clouds peeking over the top of one of them, watching and laughing at our every thought.  I often wonder, what if we just went about trying to make the changes that we want, expecting that things will eventually change?  What if we were the change we wanted to see?  Ghandi suggested it first, could it really work?  I wonder…..

    I was reading a book of poetry last night.  It was called God’s Trombones.  It is an amazing book.  Of course, it is very dated, and some of the theology doesn’t match mine, but it brings me back to the pain and unjustness of the times that this book was written.  You see, the poems are “Negro Spirituals”, according to the author.  A very rich treasure of hurt, pain, sorrow, joy, growth, acceptance, love, and questions.
    One of the poems begins with the lines.  “Your arms are too short to box with God.”  What a picture.  What if we could comprehend that idea each and every day.  What if instead of questioning and trying to wiggle our way out of what God wants us to do, we just went on and did it?  What if we found ways to share the love of God with everyone instead of trying to judge every person for some infraction of a law that we want enforced?  What if we spent as much time finding ways to empower a person in poverty as we spend supporting companies that put people in poverty?  What if…..?

    I’m very sorry for the absence from my blog.  I really enjoy this, yet several things created space that I didn’t have the energy to barge through.  The internet was down at the church for a week, and I was gone for several days to Phillips for Ministers week.  So….sorry, and here we go.
    One of the things that I got to do while I was in Tulsa was here Dr. James A. Forbes Jr. preach.  What an event.  Dr. Forbes was the Sr. Pastor at the Riverside Church in New York City for 18 years.  His sermon was entitled one thing, and yet he felt led to preach on a different thing. (Sound familiar)   What he spoke about was that this was going to be the year of the Lord’s favor.  People in the United States and around the world have more hope than they have ever had.  They feel like the people who have been assembled to lead this country have more integrity than ever before, and are more determined to bring everyone along.  What a great witness to the Christian  choice of life. 
    I was renewed, and encouraged by this great man of God, and I look forward to the new possibilities that are unfolding each day for our country as well as our congregation.

    I’ve been thinking alot about responsibility today.  How people learn to be responsible, how they decide to be responsible, and what we expect responsible people to act like.  I’m not sure that I know the answers to any of those questions.  But I do know this.  I learned about responsiblity by being around responsible people, and being held accountable for my actions.  
    It seems to me that we don’t do that much anymore.  We tend not to hold people accountable for their actions.  We make excuses for people, and we accept excuses from people that we all know are lies.  Part of being responsible, is doing what you commit to do, when you commit to do it, and in the way that you agreed to.  It doesn’t mean you get to change your mind because the thing you said you would do happens to be at the same time the L word is on television.  
    Somedays, I wish there were a magic pill that would create responsible thoughts in people, which would in turn create responsible actions.   But then where would the growth opportunities come from?

    I went to a funeral today.  A friends mother died.  I thought I was just going as a friend.  I left a survivor, a person still trying to deal with my mothers death.  My mom died 10 years ago.  I dealt with all the loss and grief, and hurt feelings, and lonliness.  Newsflash:  it comes back.  
    Parents are the funniest people.  We grow up wanting them to leave us alone so we can grow up and be the grown up that we want to be.  We listen to them as young adults, just enough to get them to shut up.  Sometimes, when it turns out their advice was right, we might have the courage to tell them, but not often because we don’t want them to get a big head.
    As they age, we secretly hope that we don’t have to change their diapers.  As I listened to the stories my friend was telling, the longing for my mom to call resurfaced.  She used to call every night sometime after midnight.  She had had time to take a nap, watch some television, and was ready to talk about both our days.  She knew I would be up, and have time to talk at that time.  She was right.  We had some of our most wonderful talks in the middle of the night.
    As I was driving home thinking about the day, I wonder if this is the way God feels about us.  God longs for us to call home again, share the stories of our day, and listen for the story of Gods day.  I wonder if the world would be different if this were true.
    

    I just spent the past week in the Northwest with family that I don’t get to see very often.  I was faced with the issue of privilege almost every hour.  One family in a position of no privilege and another in a position of lots of privilege.  Both sets of parents working their tails off to provide for their families.  Both sets of parents want their children to have things they never had, to be well educated, and to find happiness.  The whole experience reminded me of what people must have thought during the time that The Christ was born.  A child born to a set of parents that basically had nothing.  And…had obviously done something wrong for her to be pregnant before they were married.  
    Privilege, the idea that just because of who you are, what color you are, what sex you are, who your parents are, you are in a position above other people.  In the United States, white men are the privileged class.  For the most part, they hold the power, they control decisions.  Here is part of the problem.  A lot of white men, don’t believe they are in any position  of privilege, and some aren’t.  How do you change that?  Here is the real kicker.  The people in power have to be willing to change the way they live.  For example.  If you and I are willing to continue buying lettuce and produce that we know come from farms where people are paid less than livable wages, we are not willing to give up our position of privilege.  However, if we give up some of our position and spend more to buy produce from farms that we know pay their workers a livable wage, then we are trying to shift the power of privilege.  It is hard to always make those sorts of choices, especially in an economy like ours, but the power of privilege is ours to do with what we will.

    A couple of months ago at a meeting and eating we talked about helping out a family at Christmas.  The places that we looked for a family had already served everyone they knew about.  So I gave up.
    Yesterday, a 14 year old boy received food from his school for his family; His six siblings and his grandmother who they all live with.  He was so grateful, then today he went back to one of the people and asked if there were going to be any presents for his little brothers and sisters.  If there weren’t, that was ok, he was just wondering.
    The administrator who called the grandmother to check out the question, was almost in tears because the grandmother felt so humiliated.  When asked what the kids needed or wanted, she said, if they could just get some underwear and socks, I would be so grateful.
    Knowing this faith community the way that I do, I believe they will have much more.

    I’ve Been reading a book by Parker Palmer called The Promise of Paradox.  I’m almost done with it, so you shouldn’t have to hear about it much more.  It is a great book though.  One of the ideas that he discusses is the idea of paradox verses dualities.  The way I understand it, is like this.  Paradox demands tension between two apparent opposites.  For example good and bad, black and white, right and wrong.  Dualities would be the two apparent opposities just mentioned above.  Sort of wierd, but consider this.
    Palmer says “There is truth in both poles, and we live most creatively when we live between them in tension.” (63)  Now, I find myself, more often than not, trying to balance the right and wrong opposites around the issue of the foodbank.  The rules are: people may come once a month.  If you come more than that, you are not supposed to get food.  Yesterday, a woman with 5 kids walked to the food pantry in the snow and temperatures in the teens, to get food for her family.  She had been there two weeks ago.  She shouldn’t get food.  She did get food.  
    A man came for food, asked if we had any shoes.  After making sure his kids had shoes, there was no money left for him to have new shoes.  He left with shoes.
    A woman came through the door, minutes before time to close.  We had been hit hard, energy was running a bit low.  She asked to talk to me.  Our food pantry had blessed her in the past, she wanted to share from her blessings this year.  She donated $200.00. 
    We must live into the paradox and stand in the tension, if we are to lean on the strength of God.

    The last week before Christmas.  The waiting is almost over.  I was thinking about waiting and expectation this morning as I was praying.  Not only in the midst of the advent Christmas season, but also in the context of the play.  I was thinking about hearing the cast talking on Saturday night after the play.  They were all exhausted, yet there was a sense of loss in all their voices.  It was over now.  The thing they had worked weeks and weeks to do, was over.  There would not be another curtain call, no more audiences, no more hurrying home after work to be at the church in time for rehearsal.  What a relief, and yet what a loss.
    Much the same for Christmas, I think.  We build up these hopes and expectations for THE BIG DAY.  For some it is more than one day, with Christmas at this parents on one day, Christmas at another parents on another day.  Sometimes, just scheduling where you are going to be at what time is as grueling as the day itself.  And yet, when it is all over, all the packages opened, all the food consumed and packed properly in the tupperware for the next days lunch, there is that same sense of loss.  
    I used to think it a sense of emptiness that I needed to fill.  As I have matured, I find it to be more a time of reflection on the day or the event.  A time of searching for the meaning in the event, and wonder at the extent of all that has happened.
    Each one of the actors in our play, should feel an enormous sense of pride in what they were able to do.  They were amazing.  Each one of them in their own way, yet as a cast, what an impact they made.  Much like the birth of The Christ.  One moment in time event, life lasting meaning.

    Last night was the first night of the show Radio TBS at the church.  What a scream!  I have watched these actors and actresses work day after day for over a month to make this show happen.  Although there were some days, I am sure they never thought they would get their lines right, THEY DID.  One of the most amazing things to witness is the bonding and community that has developed within this group of people.  The production of the show has become more important than who gets the credit, who forgets their lines, whose costume doesn’t work, and who stands in the light.  
    Exactly where John the Baptist was with Jesus.  Vision….vision to go the extra mile for the team.  Community that loves and cares about each other becomes more important than what I want or need.  That concept, no matter how foreign to us, is in fact the beloved community that Jesus envisioned,that Martin Luther spoke of, that Ghandi worked toward, and that will move us closer to the Justice that Micah spoke of.  May it be so.